Looking Forward
I do not like waiting. If you know me, you'd know that I am almost always on time for a meeting, for a submission, for a reply. For me, it is a sign of respect to not keep people waiting or wondering.
What usually happens when you are on time though? Yes, you are right. You wait. Because everybody else seem to take their time. So, in the not so short story of my life, there are many occasions when I have to wait. Its funny that I almost always gravitate to people who are too relaxed for my sanity.
When I wait, I feel edgy, too eager, restless, and being the over thinker that I am, I tend to make unnecessary commentaries in my head about the thing, the event, the people that make me wait. The thing is, I could not begin to work on anything productive, even just to while away the time when I wait. I'm kinda set like that.
However, recently, I have come to accept waiting and look at it in a new perspective.
To come to terms with my "little love- lot of hate" relationship with waiting, I am now using it to fuel my energy for things to come.... because we can only hope to see the best years of our lives are ahead of us.
Indeed, if we are not waiting for something, what is there to look forward to?
1. Waiting for the right time. Like comedy, life is all about timing. The clock sometimes work for us and sometimes against us. The thing is, in most cases, they start to make sense when what we long for starts to happen.
The timing, the events leading to it and the circumstances of the present that makes it even more enjoyable. There are just things in life that takes time. The right time will come, it will.
2. Waiting for the ripe time. If waiting for the right time is about timing, the ripe time is about us. How ready are we for the things we hope for? How much work have we invested on it?
A former office mate once told me a line I will not forget. As I walk inside the office looking tired and defeated she said, "Papasaan pa at makukuha mo din yan." That statement stayed with me to this day.
I remember this especially when I start doubting the process, when I feel like evil people get their way, when I feel like I deserve something more than others. I remember it not only to keep waiting, but also to keep doing what I am doing right.
3. Waiting for the rite time. Spiritually, the rite time matters. Of course, this is just a play of words now, but the realization did strike one day at mass. The realization was this: that our ultimate wait is to be in heaven and that the value of the mass depends entirely on how much we look forward to it.
Do you?
You see, at consecration, we place ourselves at the foot of the cross, benefiting from the sacrifice, from the love, from the blood spilled at the very time of Crucifixion. Immersed in that scene, I realized, how would someone who does not look forward to (believe in) heaven look at that scenario: A man hanging on the cross, all wounded, sacrificing for what? It would be a world of difference I am sure.
Today, officially, I am making amends with the act of waiting. I will make peace with the petty waiting times. There are bigger things in life that I wait for... no, that I look forward to.
Call them goals, dreams, hopes. No matter what name you call them, they invite us to put one foot ahead of the other and move along to better things: the things that are meant for us, that things that we get because of us and the things that we get because we make ourselves present for our destiny.
What usually happens when you are on time though? Yes, you are right. You wait. Because everybody else seem to take their time. So, in the not so short story of my life, there are many occasions when I have to wait. Its funny that I almost always gravitate to people who are too relaxed for my sanity.
When I wait, I feel edgy, too eager, restless, and being the over thinker that I am, I tend to make unnecessary commentaries in my head about the thing, the event, the people that make me wait. The thing is, I could not begin to work on anything productive, even just to while away the time when I wait. I'm kinda set like that.
However, recently, I have come to accept waiting and look at it in a new perspective.
To come to terms with my "little love- lot of hate" relationship with waiting, I am now using it to fuel my energy for things to come.... because we can only hope to see the best years of our lives are ahead of us.
Indeed, if we are not waiting for something, what is there to look forward to?
The timing, the events leading to it and the circumstances of the present that makes it even more enjoyable. There are just things in life that takes time. The right time will come, it will.
2. Waiting for the ripe time. If waiting for the right time is about timing, the ripe time is about us. How ready are we for the things we hope for? How much work have we invested on it?
A former office mate once told me a line I will not forget. As I walk inside the office looking tired and defeated she said, "Papasaan pa at makukuha mo din yan." That statement stayed with me to this day.
I remember this especially when I start doubting the process, when I feel like evil people get their way, when I feel like I deserve something more than others. I remember it not only to keep waiting, but also to keep doing what I am doing right.
3. Waiting for the rite time. Spiritually, the rite time matters. Of course, this is just a play of words now, but the realization did strike one day at mass. The realization was this: that our ultimate wait is to be in heaven and that the value of the mass depends entirely on how much we look forward to it.
Do you?
You see, at consecration, we place ourselves at the foot of the cross, benefiting from the sacrifice, from the love, from the blood spilled at the very time of Crucifixion. Immersed in that scene, I realized, how would someone who does not look forward to (believe in) heaven look at that scenario: A man hanging on the cross, all wounded, sacrificing for what? It would be a world of difference I am sure.
Today, officially, I am making amends with the act of waiting. I will make peace with the petty waiting times. There are bigger things in life that I wait for... no, that I look forward to.
Call them goals, dreams, hopes. No matter what name you call them, they invite us to put one foot ahead of the other and move along to better things: the things that are meant for us, that things that we get because of us and the things that we get because we make ourselves present for our destiny.
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