Joy

What's the plan?  Have you met people who no matter how life treats them, they seem to have the same conclusion or goes the same direction.  People who, for example, have in their environment the best type of people but always ends up with people who mistreat them, or takes advantage of them. There are also those who despite being the midst of the worse situation seems to get through them and get through the situation victorious.   The way we act, the way we perceive how people and life treats us is what we may call "life scripts".  Life scripts are belief systems, unconscious life plans that was created in childhood because of early interactions, validations by significant people and further verified by our life experiences.  Since we operate under the perceptions created by our life scripts, unless challenged, our life scripts may manifest in our lives more and more.   Some life scripts may sound (and look like) this:  ...

Happiness inspires productivity.  Productivity inspires happiness.  I think this is a debate cum chicken or egg.   Well, if you are happy, I hope it fuels your productivity. When you are sad... get your @ss off the coach and keep moving. I think in the topic of productivity, good is often the enemy of the best.  It is seldom that anyone admits to not doing anything.  We report to work, we do our tasks, we move about.  Yet, are we reaching our most productive self? Here are 8 things to get us closer to our most productive self.    1.  Set your Direction .  As Stephen Covey said, " It doesn't really matter how fast you are going, if you are heading in the wrong direction".  Before we rush into the issue of productivity, we should first determine if we are moving towards the right direction.  It is worthwhile to spend time to identify your end goal and then prioritize the top three actions that will get...

They say, you have to create a vision so that the universe can take you there.  I did not believe it so.  Until I had to.   Back in 2005 when I quit my job because of Psoriasis, I thought I'd continue on with my life as a bum.  Well luckily, since my father has a business, I would have somewhere to land, no matter what.  Yet, one night I found myself describing what my next job would be.   Mindlessly scribbling despite my firm belief that this was it for me - I would stay hidden from people and tucked in our little home office all my life.   I wrote:  My next job would be in Training.  I wanted to teach. I have a different energy when I am in front of an audience, in front of student.  I love it when people learn from me.  I make it a point I learn from them as well.  So, I would teach again.   Next, I wrote that I wanted it to pay more than what I used to earn.  That is a gi...

Making that a double just to be sure. I lost a friend last week.  It was also the week to remember our departed loved ones.  The reminders were poignant. We will not be here for long.  We are all in our last NN years. So what do we do with our last NN Years? For me,  I want them to go this way... 1.  I want to make as many decisions as I can. Sometimes, I feel that I am not making decisions because my emotion, cravings or the easy way just ends us to be the "decision makers" of the day.  I want to be able to face as many situations where I will think and decide and enjoy or pay the consequences. I want each crossroads to make me feel brave facing them and proud having gone through them. 2.  I want to meet as many people and know their stories. I want to look at as many faces as I can and wonder what their stories are. I want them to know that someone is interested to hear them out and is willing to give the time.  I want to hear...

People know me now as someone who travels a lot.  I sometimes receive sms starting with the question... "Are you in Manila?"  as if I am always away.  (I wish!) It is true that traveling does give me joy.  It is a source of many good memories, experiences and life lessons.  Looking back though, I actually started as an accidental traveler. Back in the day (yes millenial friends... this is for you) traveling out of your own city is a luxury, not a necessity (and yes, my gen x-er friends, it has evolved into a necessity).   I remember that before the dawn of budget airlines, only the rich travel by plane.  Hong Kong is THE destination and Batangas IS the beach place. A year into my job as a counselor in ICA, I attended a fair for overseas schools exhibiting their institutions to incoming collage freshmen at the World Trade Center in Pasay.  That event was attended by almost all the exclusive schools in Luzon and it ran for 3 days....

Fear Of Missing Out.  This is one phenomenon that governs the modern psyche.  Many of our loneliness can be traced from this inordinate fear. I can only hope I do not have it, but strive as I may to do away with it, my disquiet and easily distracted mind tells me otherwise.  How about you?  When we say we do not want to miss out, what do we actually mean?  Miss out on what? Ultimately, F.O.M.O may mean not being able to be fully happy with the moment because something better might just be happening around the corner.  It means not being happy with our wardrobe because what we buy today is so last season by the time we get home.  It means being tentative in relationships because a better person may just be out there.   It means not being fully engaged in our work because we question the  finality of the path we are taking towards that "calling". What is common in all these? Tentativeness, discontent, covetousness, loneliness. ...

Believe me, no one needs this blog more than me. I'll tell you why. I was literally doing this one day when I realized that all is fine.  So Buddha, nice thought! In our household, we are problem solvers.  We were brought up by parents who are uber responsible.  They are the most reliable people I know - ever.  Being tardy, being unable to submit anything completely, leaving people dissatisfied, or even not being able to anticipate things going bad is frowned upon. Not to mention that socially, they also tend to be a magnet for people who needs help.  They were caring and always ready to lend a hand.  My tatay and nanay do this very differently, I tell you. But they both have good hearts. So, I grew up wanting to be like them. I might have overdone some parts though. I overthink.  You know the current expression " advance mag-isip"?  I embody that. I googled overthinking and joy and all I saw were posters of how overthinking "murder...